Home   Forum   Register   Login   Search


Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 17 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2
Author Message
 Post Posted: Sun Apr 17, 2011 4:19 pm 
Offline
CC Supporter: Gudtimes w/ a Sixpack & a Stogie Show Host
User avatar

Joined: Sat Dec 26, 2009 12:03 am
Posts: 844
Location: Los Angeles Area
Again..El Topo talks about "FRAMING" the interaction...

[Youtube]http://youtu.be/3kHxG57bV-g[/Youtube]

http://youtu.be/3kHxG57bV-g


HERE is another video on QUALIFICATION:

El Topo gives his take on "QUALIFICATION"...NOTE: GET TO RAPPORT really quickly with her!! ...Asking questions help guide the interaction and to how you want the interaction to proceed...

1) Get her to invest

2) Value: give/take
or
3) Do you like her?? (if you are at the point, if want to be with certain girls based on your likes)

4) USE these "qualifying questions" Let's you guide the interaction between you and her..."fun" "adventurous time"

[Youtube]http://youtu.be/rsS-OboVB70[/Youtube]

http://youtu.be/rsS-OboVB70

JUST "GUIDELINES"....NOT STRICT RULES.....


GUDTIMES....

:hi: :hi: :hi: :good: :good: :hi: :hi: :hi:

_________________

"If you’re willing to do today what others won’t, you can perform tomorrow like others can’t."


"Tell me and I'll forget; show me and I may remember; involve me and I'll understand.”
- Chinese proverb

Co-host of Gudtimes with a Sixpack and Stogie Show
viewforum.php?f=178&st=0&sk=t&sd=d&start=0


Share on FacebookShare on TwitterShare on OrkutShare on DiggShare on RedditShare on DeliciousShare on TechnoratiShare on TumblrShare on Google+
Top 
 Profile  
 
 Post Posted: Sun Apr 17, 2011 4:50 pm 
Offline
CCOC Team Lead
User avatar

Joined: Wed Jul 22, 2009 2:25 am
Posts: 2193
Location: San Diego
Good shit Gudimes...I would also like to add a little to this post. I know on this pod I really emphasized on new guys needing to learn "basic communication skills" before worrying about gaming woman (opening, building comforting, sexualizing, etc). This is a great article and I'll post it in the Noob section later on.....

How To Have a Great Conversation

Step 1
Listen. This is the most important part of any conversation. Pay attention to what is being said. Make acknowledging noises or movements to indicate that you are still listening. A conversation will not go anywhere if you are too busy thinking of anything else, including what you plan to say next. If you listen well, the other person's statements will suggest questions for you to ask. Allow the other person to do most of the talking. They will often not realize that it was they who did most of the talking, and you get the credit for being a good conversationalist - which of course, you are!

Step 2
Find out what the other person is interested in. You can even do some research in advance when you know you will have an opportunity to talk with a specific person. Complimenting them is a great place to start. Everyone likes sincere compliments, and that can be a great ice-breaker.

Step 3
Ask questions. What do they like to do? What sort of things have they done in their lives? What is happening to them now? What did they do today or last weekend? Identify things about them that you might be interested in hearing about, and politely ask questions. Remember, there was a reason that you wanted to talk to them, so obviously there was something about them that you found interesting. However, try to space out your questions or they'll feel like you're interrogating them which is very bad and closes off friendships.

Step 4
Forget yourself. Dale Carnegie once said, "It's much easier to become interested in others than it is to convince them to be interested in you." If you are too busy thinking about yourself, what you look like, or what the other person might be thinking, you will never be able to relax. Introduce yourself, shake hands, then forget yourself and focus on them instead.

Step 5
Practice active listening skills. Part of listening is letting the other person know that you are listening. Make eye contact. Nod. Say "Yes," "I see," "That's interesting," or something similar to give them clues that you are paying attention and not thinking about something else - such as what you are going to say next.

Step 6
Ask clarifying questions. If the topic seems to be one they are interested in, ask them to clarify what they think or feel about it. If they are talking about an occupation or activity you do not understand, take the opportunity to learn from them. Everyone loves having a chance to teach another willing and interested person about their hobby or subject of expertise.

Step 7
Paraphrase back what you have heard, using your own words. This seems like an easy skill to learn, but takes some practice to master. Conversation happens in turns, each person taking a turn to listen and a turn to speak or to respond. It shows respect for the other person when you use your "speaking turn" to show you have been listening and not just to say something new. They then have a chance to correct your understanding, affirm it, or embellish on it.

Step 8
Consider your response before disagreeing. If the point was not important, ignore it rather than risk appearing argumentative. If you consider it important then politely point out your difference of opinion. Do not disagree merely to set yourself apart, but remember these points:

• It is the differences in people--and their conversation--that make them interesting.

• Agreeing with everything can kill a conversation just as easily as disagreeing with everything.

• A person is interesting when they are different from you; a person is obnoxious when they can not agree with anything you say, or if they use the point to make themselves appear superior.

• Try to omit the word "but" from your conversation when disagreeing as this word often puts people on the defensive. Instead, try substituting the word "and", it has less of an antagonistic effect.

Step 9
Consider playing devil's advocate - which requires care. If your conversation partner makes a point, you can keep the conversation going by bringing up the opposite point of view (introduce it with something like "I agree, and..."). If you overuse this technique, however, you could end up appearing disagreeable or even hostile.

Step 10
Do not panic over lulls. This is a point where you could easily inject your thoughts into the discussion. If the topic seems to have run out, use the pause to think for a moment and identify another conversation topic or question to ask them. Did something they said remind you of something else you have heard, something that happened to you, or bring up a question or topic in your mind? Mention it and you'll transition smoothly into further conversation!

Step 11
Know when the conversation is over. Even the best conversations will eventually run out of steam or be ended by an interruption. Smile if you're leaving, and tell them you can't wait to talk to them again soon. Ending on a positive note will leave a good impression and likely bring them back later for more!

Step 12
Make a good first impression. Smile, ask questions that require more than a yes/no answer, and really listen. Maintain eye contact and keep as friendly and polite as possible.

Tips

• If, after the conversation concludes, you come away feeling full of yourself there is a chance you maneuvered the talk to serve your own agenda and steam-rolled your counterpart. You used the occasion to show off your wit and knowledge. Try to keep from using a conversation to boost your ego.

• Try to get them talking about something they enjoy thinking about and something that you're interested in hearing or else the conversation isn't fulfilling and one of you will feel unsatisfied with it.

• Don't be worried about the conversation and where it will go. People have natural conversation reflexes built into them. Why can't you ever remember how a good conversation started? The reason is because you had a conversation starter and then you let the reflexes kick in. This made the conversation transition smoothly, enjoyably, and naturally. Thinking too much will make an awkward conversation that is difficult to keep going.

• The best conversations come from gaining new understanding about the topic discussed or the person. Try to lead into personal stories and anecdotes. These give limitless conversation and are revealing about the character of a person.

• It's okay to talk about yourself some as long as the person listening is interested and getting new information about you or the topic. People don't like to rehash things they already know or have thought about so try to give a new perspective or way of thinking if you're the one speaking.

• Always think before you speak. Do not take a long time to answer but listen well to keep on the right track with the conversation. Try not to make an embarrassing mistake, such as giving an opinion which may disrespect someone else. Choose your words carefully, but do not create pointless silences by keeping your conversation partner waiting for 5 minutes before you answer a simple question.

• Remember that sometimes if a conversation isn't going well, it might not be your fault! Sometimes the other person is distracted/lost in thought, isn't willing to contribute, or is having a bad day. If they don't speak or listen, then they are the ones not using good conversation skills, not you.

Warnings

• Choose carefully when asking personal questions. You do not want to venture into overly personal issues. Even if the other person might be willing to talk about it, you may end up learning things that you really do not want to know. You certainly do not want the other person to think afterward that you coerced them into revealing personal information.

• Be sincere! Compliments are great, but too much flattery is obvious and will reveal you as being insincere.

• Beware of topics that can be inflammatory - such as religion and politics - and don't venture into them unless you know the person has roughly the same convictions as you, or the circumstances otherwise allow for pleasant discussion. Again, it's fine to disagree and can be nice to talk about differences, but it can also be a quick step toward an argument.

• Try not to argue! You do not have to agree with everything someone says, but you do not have to tell them all about how you disagree. If you feel the need to explain an opposing viewpoint, express it simply and without putting the other person on the defensive. It is better to simply change the subject in a casual conversation than to get involved in an argument.

• Try not to nod or respond with "Yes", "I see", or "OK" so much. It might make the person feel that you are bored and may sometimes seem like you are rushing them along. Never say anything hurtful or offensive to the other person, this may project a bad feeling between you.

• If it is a planned conversation, try listening to the news in case you run out of things to say; it is always a good solution.

• Also try not to cut the person off mid-sentence. It seems disrespectful and it makes it seem like you think that what you have to say is more important than what others have to say. Let the person finish their thoughts and then continue on with thoughts of your own.

• While you want to talk about a topic, make sure you pause in between sentences which allows for the other person to ask a question to clarify if they are understanding you and/or for them to interject with a thought of their own. Remember, you want to have a conversation, not be a story-teller.

http://www.wonderhowto.com/how-to-have- ... on-080202/

_________________
~ Just Mingle, Stay Single My Friends

You Can't Change The Past, But You Can Do Something About The Future


Top 
 Profile  
 
 Post Posted: Sun Apr 17, 2011 5:00 pm 
Offline
CC Supporter: Gudtimes w/ a Sixpack & a Stogie Show Host
User avatar

Joined: Sat Dec 26, 2009 12:03 am
Posts: 844
Location: Los Angeles Area
"The framing methodology itself can be adapted to ANYTHING provided you know what the Societal and/or Authoritative frames (the default frames) are and you know WHAT frames you need to set and which frames to avoid…" - Captain Jack

"That’s the utmost basic concept of Sexual Framing, a short way of saying set the sexual frames, let her know you are not judgmental, etc." - Captain Jack

"Decide to run experiments and gather data. Give up the need to be right. Don’t draw conclusions instead work with principles and focus on workability instead of belief/truth." -Captain Jack

As he mentions...Don't worry about reputation...go out...ABANDON the EGO...to get the "skills"......Going out in the field is for "FUN"..."HAVING FUN and FUCKING AROUND" mentality....


Here is excerpt from Captain Jack with people asking him questions:

QUESTION: What do you think are the first ten(10) things a newbie pua have to work on in order to have a good solid game in a shorter period of time?? (AA, sexual, frames, state, opening, sxf…?).

CAPTAIN JACK:
1. Get extremely extroverted.
2. Watch women notice guys in a bar/club environment.
3. Watch how hard women try to get men to open them.
4. Open 100 women with a very simple conversational stack with no other purpose than getting through the stack.
5. Read Sperm Wars
6. Learn Game Dynamics
7. Learn Sexual Framing
8. Go out with a Stack and open 12 sets per night with no other purpose than getting through the stack.
9. If it’s going well tell her you don’t want the night to end and tell her to come with you to watch a DVD.
10. Make sweet love.


QUESTION:
1. What do you typically say next after opening a girl with a group?
2. What do you typically say next after opening a girl away from her group?
3. In terms of opening is there any difference when opening a 10, or would you just use your usual low investment openers like ‘hey, i just noticed you from over there…’ etc.


CAPTAIN JACK:
1. I will riff off of something they’ve said or whatever comes to mind. It is not hard to keep things going. You could ask them what they’re up to, if they went somewhere else earlier, if they’ve heard this band before, shit… you could even tell them why you like this club.

2. “Now that we’re alone I can finally start REALLY hitting on you” or something similar if I need to. Most of the time I just keep the convo going light and look for things to Clarify.

3. I’ve done an experiment a few times where I’ve posted pictures of hot women and had people rate them. It’s all over the board. What’s a 10? Who the fuck knows man. Further, there are a lot of beautiful women who didn’t bloom until they were 20. Are they still 10s? They weren’t treated special during their formative years. Their whole world filter is much like that of the 5 or whatever. I have trouble buying the 10 thing nowadays. I believe it has more to do with YOUR REACTION than anything else.


QUESTION:
3. What cause you to eject from a set ever?
4. What’s the attitude or vibe you want to project during your pickups?
5. When do you find out logisitics and what’s your opinion on them?
6. Do you always wait till’ the end of the night to go for the pull?
7. You mention making her feel it and making her feel sexy, letting her know she is having an effect on you and so on, how much is it you blaming her for your escalations?
8. Do you ever get ‘anti-slut’ defense when moving along the SF gradient scale of sexual compliements, if so how do you handle it?
9. Do you ever get disagreements while attempting to get agreements on the game dynamics, if so how do you handle those?



CAPTAIN JACK:
3. If it’s not going anywhere or I feel like it’s an uphill battle I test that against my desire for her specifically. It has to outweigh it or I’m out. However, I have to say that working with smooth gradients really, really cuts down on the work. If you get in and start laying things down really step-by-step man it is so easy. It’s that old story about turning up the temperature on a frog so slowly that it never realizes its time to hop out until the water is already boiling.
4. Smooth confidence without trying hard and super comfortable around her and her sexuality
5. Logistics?
6. Yes. No reason in particular just the way I’ve always done it.
7. It’s entirely her fault! If she wasn’t so damn sexy!
8. Not really. ASD is actually caused more by confusion on what Game you are playing. If she knows its a Sexual Game and she’s agreed to it then she’ll surprise you with how naughty she can be.
9. If I do I usually bail but it happens more on Day2s than it does on first meetings. Day2s she’s had time to think about what she wants (a boyfriend, husband, dater, etc) and so she’ll try to put that out there usually fairly early. On first meetings it is much easier to go for the SNL Game.



So here are some answers that some of you might be asking...I can't answer all of them but Captain Jack and others have answered as best as possible.



REMEMBER...DO IT...GO OUT...HAVE FUN...HAVE THE BALLS...GET her to INVEST! CONNECT with Her..BODY LANGUAGE...KEEP YOUR FRAME....PULL THE TRIGGER when all signs point yes!! Lead the interaction..


GUDTIMES...

:hi: :hi: :hi: :good: :good: :hi: :hi:

_________________

"If you’re willing to do today what others won’t, you can perform tomorrow like others can’t."


"Tell me and I'll forget; show me and I may remember; involve me and I'll understand.”
- Chinese proverb

Co-host of Gudtimes with a Sixpack and Stogie Show
viewforum.php?f=178&st=0&sk=t&sd=d&start=0


Top 
 Profile  
 
 Post Posted: Sun Apr 17, 2011 5:05 pm 
Offline
CC Supporter: Gudtimes w/ a Sixpack & a Stogie Show Host
User avatar

Joined: Sat Dec 26, 2009 12:03 am
Posts: 844
Location: Los Angeles Area
Yeah, Sixpack...Good stuff posted also...Ah well..we are making it too easy for them....

NOW GO OUT AND DO IT, fellas!!!....lols...At least that gives us time to go out, have fun and FUCKING around more!! Mwuahahahaha....Less for us to keep help new guys and more time to meet more women!! Oh yea...

Dude...I got some stories to tell you man...This is getting crazy!!

GUDTIMES...

:hi: :hi: :good: :good: :hi: :hi:

_________________

"If you’re willing to do today what others won’t, you can perform tomorrow like others can’t."


"Tell me and I'll forget; show me and I may remember; involve me and I'll understand.”
- Chinese proverb

Co-host of Gudtimes with a Sixpack and Stogie Show
viewforum.php?f=178&st=0&sk=t&sd=d&start=0


Top 
 Profile  
 
 Post Posted: Sun Apr 17, 2011 6:38 pm 
Offline
Moderator
User avatar

Joined: Thu Feb 10, 2011 12:02 pm
Posts: 401
Gudtimes!

You say "Just do it!".It is like a sports.You mean you read rule book,do it and learn from activity.I see.

Yes,trying is not doing.It telegraphed to your opponent.Like a fighting,you need to train your body and learn techniques from practice fight.There are many UFC fans but they do not fight.So,you mean 'be fighter!"This is something like a underground community like a"fight club'?Just kidding!It is physical and mental combination game like a sports.If your body did not react right,you loose.It sounds deep.

Thank you have Captain Jack.He is really under the raider but so many guys mentioned his name.

I really new hear but JTR reminds me "fight club"'s "Tyler Durden".Lair spreads not just SoCal.Night and night guys do and learn the fight( game).

you point out of frame need to be changed is right.

Thank you for advice.

Where's Casanova Crew's Tyler Durden (JTR) now?Is he coming back like a fight club "TD"?


Top 
 Profile  
 
 Post Posted: Mon Apr 18, 2011 2:39 am 
Offline
CC Supporter: Gudtimes w/ a Sixpack & a Stogie Show Host
User avatar

Joined: Sat Dec 26, 2009 12:03 am
Posts: 844
Location: Los Angeles Area
OK...working late on deadlines...taking a break...so adding some more tips from Captain Jack...

Here are some examples of a student's sexual framing and then see how Captain Jack's improves and modifies the wording:

This takes practice and calibration. Field testing on many women and checking for the contingencies by their answers.

LESSON HERE: Read the student's examples FIRST...then think of how it could be better...SO here we go...Don't skip ahead...you're cheating yourself by not learning the concept and "skill" of framing...


STUDENT'S examples:

Can you critique this…off the top of my head and as per your last comment

1. Those jeans were screaming “come see me” :)

2. I know you prob hear this ALL the time but you have the sexiest lips

3.Your past boyfriends didn’t spank you enough, you’re in withdrawal. thank god I came over to save you.

4. ohhh those lips, put them away…what are you…about an 8 on the good kisser scale?

5.Eggs, cereal, toast…what else are you gonna want for breakfast tomorrow



OK....Think of each one...Imagine you and the target together...imagine yourself giving the line...is it good? or could be even better said? Remember your body language will come into play as you say this. Check body language as you deliver these...PRACTICE at home..PRACTICE in field...if there is a common place you get stuck at it...think..What is the sticking point?



NOW....here is Captain Jack's input into the student's framing examples:

REMEMBER....LEARN...LISTEN..PRACTICE...


How CAPTAIN JACK modified it even more:


1. Those jeans were screaming “come see me” :)

Hmm… I’d probably say something like, “Those jeans are DEFINITELY working for you.”

2. I know you prob hear this ALL the time but you have the sexiest lips

Good one.

3.Your past boyfriends didn’t spank you enough, you’re in withdrawal. thank god I came over to save you.

Like it.

4. ohhh those lips, put them away…what are you…about an 8 on the good kisser scale?

I don’t like the question at the end.

5.Eggs, cereal, toast…what else are you gonna want for breakfast tomorrow

No. This is too presumptive and will trigger her Anti-slut defense. A key distinction here is to make her feel like SHE is sexy. That she IS having a sexual effect on you.



Now begin to create your own...have 3 examples..that's it! for NOW...go out and and insert them into the conversation..check her reactions..hold your "frame"....and practice again with at 10-15 women each night. Check for compliance and learn the contingencies to her answers.


Good luck!

GUDTIMES...

_________________

"If you’re willing to do today what others won’t, you can perform tomorrow like others can’t."


"Tell me and I'll forget; show me and I may remember; involve me and I'll understand.”
- Chinese proverb

Co-host of Gudtimes with a Sixpack and Stogie Show
viewforum.php?f=178&st=0&sk=t&sd=d&start=0


Top 
 Profile  
 
 Post Posted: Mon Apr 18, 2011 12:40 pm 
Offline
CCOC Team Lead
User avatar

Joined: Wed Jul 22, 2009 2:25 am
Posts: 2193
Location: San Diego
KillerKahn wrote:

I would like to know CC guys hang out places.Then I see live better guys and try myself.

KillerKahn,
Keep an eye out for the upcoming CCOC meeting, we plan on having one later this week. You'll meet tons of CC guys there :drinks:

_________________
~ Just Mingle, Stay Single My Friends

You Can't Change The Past, But You Can Do Something About The Future


Top 
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
 
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 17 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests

 
 

 
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
cron